Hipocritical Supporter?

It's been a while since I've blogged. Not really expecting anyone to reply but I need to get some things of my chest. A few months ago my BF was arrested on murder charges. My cousin who was with him at the time of the alleged attack was arrested for malicious wounding and attempted murder charges. I don't know all the details nor would I want to but I know these two people. They would not attack or harm someone without just cause. i believe that they felt their lives were in danger.(my opinion) After hearing some of the testimonies and information about the "victims" I believe they meant to cause my BF and my cousin bodily harm. I don't mean to sound insensitive because I would never want someone to lose their life. I know what that family feels like because I've been through it. 6 years ago my cousin was murdered in front of his then 6 year old son. If that wasn't bad enough, his son's mother remained with the murderer and even took the children to the jail to see their father's killer.(She was the instigator in the fight that lead to my cousin's death) Some of my family has chosen to forgive her, I never will. In my opinion she deserves to be in a jail cell next to her BF. This is where the story gets sticky...am I a hypocrite for supporting my cousin and BF during their murder trial when I refuse to forgive this girl? Or, am I a hypocrite for not forgiving her while I support them? I'm torn...I just cant get over losing my cousin. I think of him every day. I think about how his son wont have many memories of him and how they were robbed of their bond. Then I think about my BF and cousin, and their kids and how they had the opportunity to be fathers and chose to put themselves in a situation that could potentially take them away from their families for the rest of their lives. I'm very confused. I'm so angry at them for not making better choices. I'm mad at my cousins ex for inserting someone into his life that took him away from us. As you can tell I have conflicting feelings. I'm being supportive for my BF's family. People are looking to me for answers and support. I'm exhausted...I have no one that I can lean on. I have my family and friends but everyone looks at me with pity or as-if to say I told you so. I don't need it. I guess that's why I've turned to blogging to strangers. I would love to hear any constructive criticism or thoughts...